Oops! My apologies. The above news report is a mistake, of course. So sorry about that, sir; quantum fluctuations such as this one do sometimes cause news from one dimension to crop up from one reality to another.
Theorists who have studied the phenomenon say it happens all the time. Something to do with the location of The Wulfshead. Especially on Groundhog Day.
No, not terrorists; "theorists," sir. The gentleman may safely put his gun away, now.
For each distinct way the world could have been, there is said to be a distinct possible world in existence somewhere in some other dimension. Or so they say. I wouldn't know, sir.
The actual world, sir?
Why, for the gentleman's purpose, it would have to be the reality the gentleman in fact lives in. At that particular place and time. And in that particular dimension. In that particular manifestation of The Wulfshead — wherever or whenever that may be, at any given place or time.
And, ah, here comes the actual report that should have been presented to the gentleman today.
Please, do disregard that earlier release, sir. I apologize for any inconvenience it may have caused.
The hors d'oeuvres are on the house.
In celebration of the Lunar New Year...
Rabbit Wings, sir! —— You don't want to know.
Posted by Substitute_Bartender : True Stories