Kathy writes: "I did a mummy demonstration when we were studying Egypt. A friend was the dead body, and I pulled out his innards and replaced them with preservatives (sawdust, salt, etc.)."
"I know how this works, Kathy."
"In Washington we call it a bill."
"Now, Kathy, my recommendation, if I may, would be that you make sure and use old clothes and sheets you have laying around the house, or buying some from the thrift store."
"This is so much better than using a roll of toilet paper!"
"What I'd suggest is a nice medium right in between. My personal favorite are streamers. You can get them at most any like any lobbying supply stores and elsewhere. About every couple of rows or so you do a little tape here, a little tape there to basically keep the basic shape. Furthermore, having some rumples actually here adds to effect, this is ancient wrapping, it's not going to look perfect, there is going to be gaps."
Nostalgia time.
ReplyDeleteNow those of us who wish to fly to Paris have to deal with some Icelandic volcano with a name nobody knows how to pronounce. Unless Icelandic, of course. But to be at the mercy of a volcano, as I find myself now, is one of those little tricks life pulls which really should be taken up with the Boss in Chief. Is it fair, I would ask Him? Do You really need impose these little abruptions of our daily happiness and well being? Couldn't you drown a cat or a puppy instead? Or maybe start a war? But why, why set off a volcano to upset my travel plans? Put me and my significant other at the mercy of such whims? Of a volcano, for God’s sakes.
You, God, are really working hard to make a bad name for Yourself. You really are. And surely You must realize this. Don’t You care? Or, with Your power, like all folks with great power, or mostly all, do You find us down beneath You so insignificant that You are unaware of our grueling discomfort and just complaints? Like LBJ taking conferees into the Oval Office gents with him when he needed to answer the call? What odors did these powerful men inhale as they stood there? What internal organ cries and groans did they hear? And how much toilet paper did our president use? Did he approach from behind or in-between? Did it take a long time at it or was he in and out? Did he wash up after finishing? For power could allow him to neglect that too, if he wished, not caring about his guest’s opinions.
That’s power. Real power.
Our current president is really trying hard. He may be a bit of an amateur at his job, but, after all, You picked him, God. That is if You become involved in such things, as most of us believe. So why do You turn him into a mere third rate sausage maker? He’s not even German (where they eat sausage all the time.) Couldn’t his natural agility and finesse be employed in creating a great banquet? Could he not be the Escoffier of world and domestic diplomacy, handling the Congress like a lion tamer in a cage? Snapping that whip keeping all the lions and tigers in line? Serving up world-class delicacies?
(My mixed metaphors don’t count here because I’m talking to God, who, if He cares, could correct them with a snap of the finger. Or the instantaneous drift of a passing thought, soon forgotten.)
Ah, LBJ was gross. But he knew how to make a good barbecue. (So long as it wasn’t in foreign policy.) We have yet to tell the final story on Obama.
I just started to read Paul Street’s book on Obama, again: Barack Obama and the Future of American Politics. Street had Obama dead-to-rights. The book was published October 2008.
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